#6: Wild by Cheryl Strayed

Wild is a beautiful story told by Cheryl Strayed.  It is her account of her time spent hiking the Pacific Crest Trail.  While I could never do what she did in a million years, I was overwhelmed by her sense of direction and need to hike in order to find her way in the world.  Her story, while real, reminded me a bit of The Walk series by Richard Paul Evans, as she is yet another soul devastated by real life who finds comfort and healing in walking. 

I found a bit of comfort in the story myself, especially in Cheryl's need to have books with her on the trail.  Now, she often ripped them apart and burned them, rather than have to carry them along with her (as I now know every ounce in the backpack counts when you are a hiker) and I found that to be a bit bothersome, but it seems as though Cheryl and I have something in common: 

They (her books) were the world I could lose myself in when the one I was actually in became too lonely or harsh or difficult to bear. (p.105)

I get it.  That's why I started reading as a child.  Loneliness.  Books were my friends.  They continue to be a source of constant comfort for me.  I guess that's why you won't find me somewhere without a book in my bag. 

There was one other passage in Cheryl's account that got me thinking about my own life.  It's actually something her mother once told her: 

I never got to be in the driver's seat of my own life.  I always did what someone else wanted me to do.  I've always been someone's daughter or mother or wife.  I've never just been me. (p. 273) 

Her mother's words hit home for me, as I realize that I am about be be 43 in the spring and I have never lived alone, never supported myself, and have never made decisions without thinking about how they would impact my family.  This begs the question...Am I strong enough to ever live alone?  Or does it matter...will I always be defined in terms of other people?  I suspect the latter.  Living alone terrifies me.  I need my family and am quite content being defined by them.  I think, honestly, it was the life I was meant to lead.  

I'll leave the hiking to Cheryl.  :)

Happy reading, everyone! 
-Dodie